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Tachikoma

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Guest SlyEnemy

The fact that they're interviewing Dizzee Rascal just because he's black, lol.

 

"Which black people do we know who live in the UK?"

"Hmmm... What about Trevor Macdonald?"

"No, he's not black enough. His hair is white"

"Dizzee Rascal?"

"I'll call him immediately! Hello, is this Dizzee Rascal?"

"Yeah blah! Wickid innit? S'mee blaat, chicken nuggets, brraaaapp!"

"Excellent, bo diggity, would you like to be on Jeremy Paxman to talk about the new King of America?"

"Ahh daan't knaa naffin abaat him dinn aii?"

"He's black"

"Yeah wickid innit! I know baat blaat and ting"

 

I love Dizzee Rascal, it's like he was brought up to speak like that or something.

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The fact that they're interviewing Dizzee Rascal just because he's black, lol.

 

"Which black people do we know who live in the UK?"

"Hmmm... What about Trevor Macdonald?"

"No, he's not black enough. His hair is white"

"Dizzee Rascal?"

"I'll call him immediately! Hello, is this Dizzee Rascal?"

"Yeah blah! Wickid innit? S'mee blaat, chicken nuggets, brraaaapp!"

"Excellent, bo diggity, would you like to be on Jeremy Paxman to talk about the new King of America?"

"Ahh daan't knaa naffin abaat him dinn aii?"

"He's black"

"Yeah wickid innit! I know baat blaat and ting"

 

I love Dizzee Rascal, it's like he was brought up to speak like that or something.

 

I was on the train home last night and there was a guy obviously of indian background and the other was of some sort of south east Asian ethnicity... they were web designers apparently, from what they were saying... but they were speaking like Dizzee Rascal. Things is the Asian one obviously blatantly didn't speak like that normally and was just trying to copy the other guy.

 

It sounded worse than me trying to do an impression of an urban black youth. Yeah, but gave me a laugh blud.

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Guest SlyEnemy
I was on the train home last night and there was a guy obviously of indian background and the other was of some sort of south east Asian ethnicity... they were web designers apparently, from what they were saying... but they were speaking like Dizzee Rascal. Things is the Asian one obviously blatantly didn't speak like that normally and was just trying to copy the other guy.

 

It sounded worse than me trying to do an impression of an urban black youth. Yeah, but gave me a laugh blud.

 

It's just as bad as chav speak to be honest. I think it's supposed to make you look cool or something, or hard, or retarded... Whatever gets the girls wet.

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Guest Sly Reflex

The speaking like yoof innit reminds me of people who try to imitate northerners. They add the t bit in and add an expression to it when it shouldn't really be thought about.

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LOL Vicar went to hospital with a tatey stuck up his Cadbury alley!

 

More tea vicar?

Lol'd at this. someone with a russian doll up their shitter! ain't they the ones with a progresively smaller doll inside? Oh the comedy.

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Guest village
Tomorrow is Hug a Red Head Day!

 

Why don't they ever have a Dry Hump Red Head day?

 

How do you know this? Linky me up.

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How do you know this? Linky me up.

 

I have been informed this by a redheaded woman.... yet I cannot find any interweb evidence. Is she trying to get me to give her a sneaky hug?

 

:A059:

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Tomorrow is Hug a Red Head Day!

 

Why don't they ever have a Dry Hump Red Head day?

 

The day after that is 'National Hug a Retard Day' so don't freak out like you did last year.

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Guest SlyEnemy
Huseyin Kalkan, the mayor of Batman, Turkey, is suing (director) Christopher Nolan and Warner Brothers for using the name of the city in The Dark Knight without his permission. In other news, Batman may have elected a retarded mayor. And should totally sue this little twerp.

 

 

 

"There is only one Batman in the world," Kalkan said. "The American producers used the name of our city without informing us." Kalkan claims he has evidence, which will show the city of Batman was founded before the 1939 debut of Bob Kane's DC Comics superhero by the same name.

 

Wow. Just wow. It all makes sense now. I mean, Batman, Turkey is like the crime-fighting capital I've never heard of. Why has this been a non-issue for the past 70 years? Simple -- stupid mayors. Somebody send that city a big bag full of cash, pronto.

 

Christopher Nolan being sued by Batman [msnbc]

 

Thanks to Morrocco Mole, Marc, and Adam, governors of The Riddler, Penguin, and Mr. Freeze, respectively.

 

 

 

 

srsly?

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:A015:

 

Second Life sex causes divorce

A couple are divorcing after a woman found her was husband cheating – with a virtual character in an online world.

 

Amy Taylor caught estranged husband David Pollard having sex with an animated woman in Second Life. 'I went mad – I was so hurt.

 

I just couldn't believe what he'd done,' said Ms Taylor, 28. 'I looked at the screen and saw his character having sex. It's cheating, as far as I'm concerned.'

 

The couple met online in 2003 and, within months, she had moved into 40-year-old Mr Pollard's flat in Newquay, Cornwall.

 

They spent hours together on Second Life, where players create fantasy lives, with jobs and relationships.

 

After two years, the pair married – in real life and in the game – but Ms Taylor said she knew something was wrong.

 

'I had my susp­icions about what he was doing in Second Life,' she added.

 

In February last year, she caught her husband's avatar, Dave Barmy, having sex with a call girl in the game.

 

Her character, Laura Skye, hired a virtual private detective to investigate his online adultery.

 

But Mr Pollard apologised and begged for forgiveness.

 

But the final bombshell came this April, when she caught her husband with his new online flame, Modesty McDonnell.

 

'I caught him cuddling a woman on a sofa in the game. It looked really affectionate,' said Ms Taylor, who filed for ­divorce the next day.

 

'He confessed he'd been talking to this woman in America for weeks and said he didn't love me any more.'

 

Ms Taylor said she was down for a while – but now has a new man, who she met in the online game World Of Warcraft.

 

Second Life, Virtual Prostitutes, Virtual Private Detectives... I have no words. At least she learned some lessons from it, eh?... Oh.

Edited by The Penultimate Ninja

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http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/odd/a136178/ma...-pasta-jar.html

 

Man caught with penis in pasta jar

 

Thursday, November 20 2008, 16:34 GMT

 

By Alex Fletcher, Entertainment Reporter

A man has been caught by police pleasuring himself with a pasta jar in his car.

 

Keith Roy Weatherley was approached by officers after he was spotted acting suspiciously near Nobbys Beach, Australia.

 

Weatherley led the cops on a ten-minute car chase after he saw them pulling up to his vehicle holding guns.

 

After he stopped, police used spray and batons to remove Weatherley from the car. Reports claim that he had a 750ml jar around his penis at the time.

 

He apparently continued to pleasure himself "in between bouts of wrestling" with the police. However, Weatherley insisted in his defence that he was resisting arrest because he wanted to make himself "decent".

 

He was fined £257 after pleading guilty to offensive behaviour and disobeying police direction.

 

Police also found pornography, a Jack Russell terrier, women's stockings and a homemade sex aid in his vehicle.

 

I hate it when that happens. Bloody pasta jars.

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Guest Sly Reflex

A cop that was on the BNP list has been suspended from duty. Thoughts on this anyone?

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A cop that was on the BNP list has been suspended from duty. Thoughts on this anyone?

 

I guess if thems the rules, thems the rules. I feel a slight stirring of pity for the person as it was a breach of their privacy that revealed it, but then again the BNP is a shitty party with nasty ideas and that person shouldn't be in a job where they would regularly have contact with minorities and are theoretically meant to treat everyone equally.

 

Garbled, but you get the point.

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Guest Sly Reflex

Yeah, I can see why they did him. It wouldn't be good for morale with shit like that going on. It wouldn't surprise me if other professionals that work for the government get done as well, especially teachers. Racial prejudice is a shitty thing to to to anyone anyway, but to do it to a child is lower than low, I know I wouldn't want any of my family being taught by a bigot.

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Guest SlyEnemy

I'm applying for a PCSO, and they won't hire anyone that's signed up to the BNP. Fair enough I say, if you were a member of any party that's prejudiced against anyone, especially when you're supposed to be upholding the law, it doesn't read right. I'd expect the same treatment if a black guy was in the police force and was a member of some Black Power group - It's just not right for the job.

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Yeah it asks you if you are or were ever involved with the bnp on the aplication form doesnt it?

 

No mention of Al-Qaeda then?

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